I am going to warn you this is not going to be a post where you laugh so hard you pee in your pants or a little giggle. No ma'am this is a post about my life right now. I just want to be completely honest and tell it like it is. So since I have been back from the beach I have been pressured a lot lately.
Pressured to look great.
Pressured to be friendly.
Pressured to act like I care.
Pressured to have a first kiss.
So many more I could come up with. But in order not to bore you half to death I'll just keep it to those four. Some girls in my life right now are making me feel like I am not good enough. They make me feel like I am the one at fault and always wrong. Even when I know the truth my thoughts bring me down. I hate that. I just want to be completely confident in who I am. Tonight I went out to dinner with Carrie. We then met up with some friends. I had a blast with Carrie we laughed so hard about stupid things! It was great. Well when it was time to meet up with the others. I mean I am going to be honest I kind of just wanted to run. Like they are so over powering sometimes and so judgmental I just want to scream. I hate that I can tell what and when they are talking about us behind my back.
I also found out one of my friends was lying to me. As much as I keep telling myself its stupid to get upset about... I am upset. And I can't hide it forever.
Tonight was just a breaking point. Like all this pressure has been building up and I feel overwhelmed. Like I am trapped and no way to get out. Tomorrow will be a better day.. I know in my heart that tomorrow WILL be a better day!